Nothing spices up a marriage like a good bedtime threesome and nothing spices up a good bedtime threesome like gunfire, a standoff and the SWAT team. Hopefully when these people get out of jail, they’ll start making videos.

David and Mindi Rice are 29 years old. They’re married and perhaps were feeling like their sex life had grown stale. So, they did what any smart couple would do and invited a slightly younger, female friend to come have sex with them. It’s the kind of thing Oprah would tell you to do.

To make this encounter even more interesting, the couple shot each other up with some prescription drugs. They probably also read about this part in Cosmo or something. It’s in the small print at the end of the “How To Keep Your Marriage Bed Steamy” article. “Don’t forget to get your hands on some highly addictive prescription drugs and then get a little high first.” So, they did that and then the three lovebirds had their tryst and fell asleep.

Upon waking from all of this fun, Mr. Rice was still feeling frisky. Maybe it was dark. Maybe he got confused. Nobody knows. But what is clear is that Mrs. Rice woke to find her loving husband loving on her friend. And she did not like what she saw. So, she did what any other wife would do. She found the nearest gun, said she would shoot the friend and then shot a hole in the ceiling. This didn’t please Mr. Rice, so he took the gun from his dutiful wife and then pointed it at her face. He threatened to kill her and then shot a hole in the wall.

The friend, obviously the most clear-headed of them all at the time, left the house as quickly as possible and then called 911 at about two in the morning. Police arrived at the scene, but the Rices didn’t seem to want to leave their residence, probably because of all the fun they were having. The SWAT team was called, the couple came out, a taser was used on Mr. Rice and the evening of fun ended with a trip to the county jail.

So, pretty much your basic three-way, only better. You can tell because they look so happy in their mug shots.

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