Holy crap.  What's the point of vacation, when it only seems to make coming back to work that much harder?  I was gone for one week.  But it seems like I'm shaking off an eternity of rust today, trying to get back into the daily routine. 

This is one of the reasons that I'm considering a "fakation", as opposed to a vacation, next time.  Not familiar with the idea of a "fakation"?  It's kind of like a "stay-cation" .  Only there's nobody nagging you to do anything.  It's where you don't tell your wife or family that you're taking vacation days.  Instead, you pretend to go to work like always, but you don't actually go.  You wake up at the same time and still call or text your wife at the same times of the day.  But you can do it from outside of your favorite bar.  The golf course, maybe?  Brothel?  Just sayin'. 

This would start by not telling your significant other how many vacation days you really have.  Because let's face it, if she finds out how many days you really have, she'll find a way to use them for you.  And you don't really need that.  But the best part of a "fakation" is that you stay on your normal schedule and don't get all out of whack, because you're actually waking up at the same time as always.  You just have an opportunity to spend your time how YOU really want to. 

This is also a great way to buy yourself some uncriticized "me" time, in the wake of being fired.  Get canned?  Fine.  Just pretend to go to work.  Then go drink and smoke all day in the park.  Or go watch a movie.  Or maybe go to your favorite Oriental Massage Spa?  Just sayin'.