U.S. Government Has Plan in Place for Zombie Outbreak
You read that right. Our government has a contingency plan should the dead rise from the grave. It's true!
A document obtained by Foreign Policy, called CONOP 8888 and also known as 'Counter-Zombie Dominance' provides a how-to guide for military planners to isolate the walking dead and kill them.
"This plan fulfils fictional contingency planning guidance tasking for US," the plan summary reads.
"Strategic Command to develop a comprehensive [plan] to undertake military operations to preserve 'non-zombie' humans from the threats posed by a zombie horde.
"Because zombies pose a threat to all non-zombie human life, [Strategic Command] will be prepared to preserve the sanctity of human life and conduct operations in support of any human population -- including traditional adversaries."
CONOP 8888, dated 30 April 2011, highlights the different kinds of zombie adversaries one might find in such attacks.
They include "vegetarian zombies" (zombie life forms which pose no direct threat to humans because they only eat plant life); "evil magic zombies" (zombie life forms created via some form of occult experimentation) and the dreaded "chicken zombies and zombies from the outer space."
The authors even describe a "worst-case threat scenario" in which the zombies would infect humans at a rapid rate.
Fearing that the document could not be taken seriously, the zombie survival guide planners wrote at the end of the paper: "This plan was not actually designed as a joke."
However it was later stated that the plan was designed as a creative training exercise. Should we ever need it? We shall see.