The amount of people ditching work on the first few days of the NCAA tournament will probably cripple the economy. The country will make up for the workforce stoppage by spending all our money on beer to drink during the games. See how it all balances out? For we are a nation who shall always persevere.
To the wild-eyed booze enthusiast, it is a sometimes-necessary evil to cut 80 proof whiskey with diet soda, to keep that girlish figure without having to throw your balls up over your shoulders and just do shots. Good news, friends -- it's also an efficient way to get tanked.
Like a wingman cleverly disguised as an iPhone case, the Intoxicase always has your back. It will not only defend your phone from harm, it's also at the ready to pop open your beer (no more searching for openers or banging the bottle on the table), and will even tell you if you've had a few too many.
We're no experts, but we imagine that dealing with drunken idiots is every cop's least favorite part of the job, especially guys like the dude about at Oktoberfest, or the Seattle man who recently peed in the back of a patrol car on Sunday while being transported to jail. Hey, can you blame him? At least he was wearing a diaper at the time.
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