Contact Us

Nearly Naked Women Sell Tickets for Hockey Team, Hockey Is Now World’s Favorite Sport

The Stanley Cup has given way to the D-cup.

In the greatest contribution to the world since allowing Yakov Smirnoff to come to the US, Metallurg Magnitogorsk, a team in Russia’s Kontinental Hockey League, recently staged a unique promotion in which half-naked women worked in the ticket office. You could say they were a real piece of ice (yes, it’s lame, but we couldn’t resist).

A team official said it was all in the name of getting fans excited (and not just in their nether regions):

We wanted to cheer the fans up before the upcoming home stand. We held auditions for night club dancers and three of them got offers to work in the ticket windows!”

Translation: this was just a gimmick to get fannies in the seats. Could it work in the States? Probably, since sex sells.

With that in mind, here’s a look at some sexual hockey terms that we just couldn’t figure out a way to work into this story, but felt would benefit humanity:

  • Penalty box
  • He shoots…he scores
  • Hooking
  • Poke check
  • Stickhandling
  • Two-on-one
  • Three-on-one
  • Stanley Hump
  • Columbus Blue Balls
  • Zamboner
  • Power lay

Best of 106.9 Classic Rock

Recommended For You

Best of the Web

Leave a Comment

It appears that you already have an account created within our VIP network of sites on . To keep your personal information safe, we need to verify that it's really you. To activate your account, please confirm your password. When you have confirmed your password, you will be able to log in through Facebook on both sites.

Forgot your password?

*Please note that your prizes and activities will not be shared between programs within our VIP network.

It appears that you already have an account on this site associated with . To connect your existing account just click on the account activation button below. You will maintain your existing VIP profile. After you do this, you will be able to always log in to using your original account information.

*Please note that your prizes and activities will not be shared between programs within our VIP network.

Please fill out the information below to help us provide you a better experience.

(Forgot your password?)

Not a member? Sign up here

Sign up for All Access Pass quickly by connecting your Facebook account. It's just as secure and no password to remember!

Sign up to have exclusive All Access Pass contests, events, coupons, presales, and much more delivered to you for FREE.