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Jacksonville Fans Can Now Support Their Team By Waving Their ‘Jag Rags’

The Jag Rag

Lots of sports teams have tried to copy the Pittsburgh Steelers’ tradition of fans waving “Terrible Towels.” Not wanting to be left out, one enterprising Jacksonville Jaguars fan has tried to jump onto the bandwagon with the “Jag Rag.” Oops.

Yes, you read that right. A Jaguars fan named Bert Sparks is marketing a hand towel with the words “Jag Rag” on it. You can get it in your choice of Jaguars teal ($10) or breast-cancer-awareness pink ($12). Sparks says that 10% of all the proceeds will go to local charities.

If you’re reading this site, odds are you’re already pretty clear on the vernacular. But if you somehow accidentally got here via a wayward link on Pinterest or a mommy blog, Urban Dictionary defines “Jag Rag” as:

1. The material (often towel, tissue, toilet paper or nearby piece of paper crumpled to softness) used to ejaculate in to at the end of a strenuous masturbatory session.

2. A rag used to clean up the mess after jacking (jaggin) off.

So there you have it. Jacksonville has given us the NFL’s first multi-purpose rally towel.  And on the bright side for the Jaguars, this is nowhere near as embarrassing as Blaine Gabbert.

Next: In A Strange Turn of Events, Drunk Man Desires Sex


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