Last weekend, my wife and I ventured to a place that has a magnificent reputation as a place to go for holiday festivities. And it completely lived up to the hype. Unfortunatley though, the massive crowd that had gathered to ooh-and-aww at the Christmas Scenes (I can't tell you where it is), brought along with them a giant magpie of odor; an ecclectic mix of smells, that were not to my liking.

Now we're talking about a place that a lot of people, of all walks, travel to during the holiday season. And in particular, LOTS of old people. Silver Foxes and Blue Hairs....everywhere.

And we all know, that a whoppingly large percentage of old people stink. I mean a bad, heinous kind of "Staink" that can't be found anywhere else. Do they pee themselves? Do they forget to wipe? Is there skin just slowly rotting? Not sure. I just know it stinks.

To be fair, the old people probably only accounted for the Urine smell. I DID hear the crunching and saw the sag of the adult diapers scattered throughout the crowd.

The rest of the smells can be attributed to overly cologned and perfumed indivuals, silent farts, bad diets, bad hygene, lack of onsite deoderant sales, bad breath and just general FUNK.

We had to ride in a shuttle van and a tram while we were there. Wow, was that bad! The smells of the large crowd on the small bus were disgustingly bad.

Just be warned.

Unless you're prepared to face a smorgasboard of foul, "people smells", then avoid the holiday crowds. Buy a video of pretty lights and do your holiday shopping online.