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Craigslist Ad of the Day

Not to be a jerk or anything but this girl said her room looked as if a 13 year old with severe developmental issues was living there. Hate to break it to you sweetheart but this ad doesn’t exactly scream “I’m a fully functioning adult”. I mean damn. She has a degree in Philosophy, an unhealthy obsession with penguins and raging obsessive compulsive issues enough to garner 300 stuffed penguins. If this is your first step in landing a man, you’ve got soooooo much farther to go.

Here is your Craigslist Ad of the Day….Enjoy!


300 Stuffed Penguins Free to Good Home

Date: 2009-06-06, 5:38PM CDT

********PENGUINS STILL AVAILABLE! Thank you for the overwhelming response********

What I’m offering here is about 300 stuffed penguins of various shapes, sizes, and species (predominately Emperor, though–like the kind in March of the Penguins) to a deserving child.

I’m going through a pretty weird time in my life right now–having just gone through a break-up and graduated college and temporarily living in my parents’ house before I move out for good in in the fall, though I remain unemployed because my philosophy degree is at *such* a premium–and sifting through my room (which has become a strange amalgam of my adolescence and burgeoning adulthood), it’s been brought to my attention that I probably won’t “catch a man” or have anyone believe I’m about to turn 23 with 300 penguins and a bunch of purple furniture around, that looking at my current room one might think some sort of 13-year-old with developmental issues is living here. I loved penguins as a child–long before they were trendy and had their own series of CGI movies or the godly voice of Morgan Freeman was involved–and collected them, often putting on penguin weddings and penguin ballet recitals where I made costumes for individual penguins, all of whom had names that I kept track of on my penguin censuses. I could recite all 16 species of penguin in alphabetical order…

…so, yes, I feel justified in saying I want a deserving child. A child that will really, well, love the penguins, and cherish his/her youth with them as it slowly slips away… Or, alternatively, some adult who has a great use for them, like if you are making the next big penguin movie (or play?). Or, if you are opening some new theme restaurant in town and need my penguins for your decor. As long as I’m auctioning off my childhood to the highest bidder, I reserve the right to be a little choosy.

E-mail with your intentions and we will work something out.


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