Unabashed lover of large breasts, pornography, foul mouths, and loud music. Childhood diagnosis of Oppositional Defiant Disorder is possibly related to current position as Associate Editor and only female employee at GuySpeed.
No Bottle Opener? You’re Not Screwed
Ever tried to be all romantic while wooing a babe by bringing a bottle of wine somewhere, only to realize you didn't bring an opener? How embarrassing for you. Watch this video, and you won't end up in the ER next time. How are those cuts healing, by the way?
Kids are the Funniest Humans on Earth and This Tumblr is Proof
'David After the Dentist' recently broke 116 Million views on YouTube. This is pretty solid proof that little kids are a lot funnier than adults, and we've found the ultimate collection of kids being hilarious.
Put Down the Axe — Good Advice For Murderers and Body Spray Lovers Alike
Please, stop using Axe Body Spray. You're ruining everything.
Serbian Village Issues Real Public Health Warning About Imaginary Loose Vampire
Guess this means 'True Blood' has finally made it to syndicated Serbian television.
In a Strange and Unexpected Turn of Events, Drunk Man Desires Sex
As we all know, drinking makes you temporarily smarter and much more clever. When sauced up, one is typically prone to acts of prolific research, groundbreaking scientific innovations, and intense spiritual discovery. That's why this South Carolina man's very different reaction to intoxica…
Give the Gift of Girth With a 3D Replica of Your Giggle Stick
You know how us dames are always telling you that we wish we could cast your manhood in bronze and carry it with us in our purse, so we'd accidentally wrap our hands around it while we were looking for our keys and grin, mischievously? No? I'm sorry, that must be a sore spot for you.
Sex House — A Reality TV Show We Wish Was Real
If there's one thing in this crazy world we can count on, it's that The Onion will always be hilarious.
Woman Arrested For Boning Down With Skeleton, This Headline Contains No Wordplay
'Brott mot griftesfriden' may sound like some sort of delicious sausage, but it's actually Swedish for 'violating the peace of the dead,' which is what a 37-year-old woman in Sweden is being charged with after allegedly having sexytimes with a human skeleton.
Good News: Study Says Porn Stars Love Themselves as Much as We Love Them
As a female who thinks porn is really fun, I hold a special place in my heart for adult film stars -- they're fun, sexy, confident, and share their fun, sexy confidence with us, what's not to like? Good news -- turns out they're pretty happy.
How to Avoid Being the Gross Dude With Dry Skin This Winter
There's a big difference between these two gents: One is a gruff, masculine lumberjack who I would kiss, and the other most likely has scaly winter skin.
NHL Lockout Causes Couples to Lock in, Like in the Sexy Way
In America, we traditionally see a jump in the NLMI (National Love Makin' Index) anytime there's a big blizzard or some other kind of catastrophic weather event that keeps us locked indoors with people who we are attracted to. (Mark our words, in eight months we there will be a bunch of New York bab…
The Real Rainman — Hot Mess of the Day
Occupation: Inventor, conservation specialist, and worry wart.