Cameron Simcik is a graduate of Bucknell University. She has written for Her Campus and is currently the Philadelphia Travel City Editor for The Daily Meal and a contributing writer for TheFW and GuySpeed.
Porn is awesome, and being in one would also be pretty awesome. Yet watching the stuff is something we usually like to do in the comfort of our own homes. Alone. However, we all know that down in Florida, things are weird -- we recently found out that porn runs in the family.
The odds of us ever winning the lottery are about as high as our shot at scoring any of the babes we feature: approximately zero. Even still, we can't help but stupidly spend tons of cash on lottery tickets, and even more time staring at those babes.
Even though we're huge fans of Christmas, the holiday season can be super stressful at times. This is particularly true when it comes to buying presents. Most people are difficult to shop for, which puts tons of pressure on us to try and decode their present preference. Will our friend like that potpourri centerpiece we're re-gifting from grandma? Probably not. What about the awful Christmas sweater in the back of our closet that still has the tag on it? We'll give that a big N-O.
With all the time we spend on Pinterest, it's no wonder we've come across so much quirky and awesome stuff. Half our holiday gift and decorating ideas come from the site alone! Want to check out Disney/Star Wars mash-up art or a cheeseburger dress? They've got you covered. Not surprisingly, the site also has a whole slew of questionable holiday products you can pin and repin, like a pickle ornament or a creepy spandex reindeer costume.
We've said it before, and we'll say it again-- Movember is our favorite time of year. There's nothing like a month full of hardy 'stache-growing to bring us men together in a weird, hairy way. However, this whole lady tickler love fest does leave our ladies on the outside. There's no way we'd let our better halves in on Movember celebrations, so what can we do to make up for it? Celebrate Decembeaver, that's what.
Santa's elves are the greatest. For starters, they work super hard in his workshop all year round making our Christmas presents and baking delicious treats so Santa maintains that cookie belly. However, we do think these charming people are highly underrated. They're arguably the most charming part of Christmas, after all! That's why we think it's important to pay homage to the little guys and girls through one of our favorite combos of all-time: babies and costumes.
Ladies and gentleman, prime time prank season is upon us. Why? Everyone's so stinkin' happy around the holidays, and the last thing they'd expect is for an evil prankster to pull out hilarious (and sometimes mean) tricks.
We never need an excuse to slap the ol' baloney pony. Name the time and place, and we'll happily be there getting off, for no reason whatsoever. It's one of our favorite pastimes, but unfortunately we have to keep it on the DL most of the time in this twisted, oppressive American society. Over in China, however, they're doing it right.
Even though Santa has an awesome job, it can be super stressful at times. Sure he's a jolly ol' guy who gives out presents for a living, but when Christmas Eve rolls around, things can get really tricky. If you think about it, the guy has to pull off delivering like, millions and millions of presents to people all around the world, so of course Santa needs to relax a bit post-Christmas. You know-- hop in the jaccuzi, get a massage or down a couple dozen chocolate chip cookies while the elves give him a manicure.
However, there are times Santa goes a little overboard with this whole "relaxing" thing, and he knocks back a few too many drinks (and we're not talking about milk). Basically, the guy gets extra, extra tipsy. He ends up passing out on sidewalks, subways and even right next to the Christmas tree. Who know Saint Nick was such a party animal?
Today marks the end of Movember, which sucks. Come tomorrow, our upper lip bushes will no longer be a symbol of our manliness, but rather a suggestion we're one of those creepy dudes who hangs in the dark corner of the strip club in jorts and a leather jacket.
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